Betrayal Trauma Therapy
Are You In Crisis Upon Discovering Your Partner’s Infidelity Or Betrayal?
You are in shock, panicked, and maybe hyperventilating. You’ve just discovered your partner’s infidelity or sex addiction—and your world is turned upside down. Feeling as though you have lost all control and questioning everything, you might be thinking this is what rock bottom looks like.
Perhaps you had a hunch that your partner was cheating, using porn, visiting strip clubs, or engaging in other sexual or emotional transgressions. But now that you know for sure, you feel betrayed, powerless, and unsure of what’s real. Your partner has been hiding information and likely gaslighting you along the way, causing you to ruminate on every detail of your partnership. You might also be blaming yourself for your partner’s infidelity, wondering if there is anything you could have done to prevent this from happening.
You’re probably wondering how did this start? What happened? Where is this relationship headed? You need answers, but you feel trapped and alone, afraid to be judged or humiliated. You need someone who understands the effects of betrayal and can guide you on the path to recovery.
Betrayal Trauma Results In A Wide Range Of Mental Health Symptoms
Caught in the crossfire of your partner’s betrayal or sex addiction, you’re likely overwhelmed with emotions. You may have developed anxiety in the form of hypervigilance or panic, or a depressed state of hopelessness. Maybe your emotions have been all over the place, ranging from grief to anger to denial, making you feel even more unsure of yourself.
In addition, you may be living with uncomfortable physical symptoms. Pain and nausea keep you from thinking clearly, and you may have noticed drastic changes in your sleeping and eating habits following the betrayal. Convinced that you and your partner can’t come back from this, you may have resorted to violent thinking or thoughts of self-harm.
With shame preventing you from discussing the betrayal, you likely feel lonely and misunderstood. Despite wanting desperately to escape the pain you’re going through, you’re just not sure if it will ever be possible to put the pieces of your life back together.
But I am here to tell you that healing can happen. As a therapist specializing in betrayal trauma, I can help you regain serenity, clarity, and joy in your life.
If You’ve Experienced Betrayal, You Are Not Alone
Infidelity and betrayal are very pervasive in our culture. Despite being common issues, they are devastatingly painful to experience.
Due to the shame and denial surrounding this topic, it’s difficult to collect accurate statistics about how many couples experience infidelity in their marriage or relationship. However, sex addiction—including the compulsive use of porn—is widespread. For religious cultures and communities, in particular, sex addiction and betrayal trauma are common yet hushed issues.
Understandably, betrayed partners do not always feel safe or secure discussing their experiences. They are not interested in unsolicited or unhelpful advice, and they don’t want to be judged if they decide to stay in the relationship. Though the betrayed may be able to recognize and remedy their role in participating in a codependent partnership or that other traumas from their past contributed to this one, it can feel safer to avoid the very tough questions facing them.
But isolation and avoidance will not cure your pain; they’ll only prevent your healing. Finding connection through community is an important way to process the betrayal and figure out if there is any way of your relationship being restored. In therapy for betrayal trauma, you can meaningfully address what happened so that you can live with confidence and peace.
Betrayal Trauma Therapy At Crown & Cloak
As a Certified Partner Trauma Therapist Candidate (CPTT-Candidate) and an APSATS-Candidate specializing in betrayal trauma, I am here to listen, see, and validate your experiences. I understand the emotions you’re feeling right now. With my firsthand yet unbiased perspective, we can work together on meaningful ways to resolve your pain.
Therapy for betrayal trauma is offered in a variety of formats. Intensive sessions are available to betrayed partners in crisis who would benefit from concentrated, multi-hour/multi-day sessions to help with acute stress and emotional regulation. Not to mention, I work with clients of all genders and orientations in therapy, and faith-based counseling is available for those who identify as Christian. I also provide a group therapy option, where betrayed partners can heal together through shared insight and experience.
Group therapy has been a meaningful aspect of both my professional development and personal healing. In addition to the creative, experiential, and skills-based methods I use in counseling, I always encourage survivors of betrayal trauma to utilize 12-step recovery programs in conjunction with counseling. I will provide you with resources for local meetings upon request.
My Therapeutic Approach
You’re in a lot of pain and despair right now. You’re justifiably angry, and while counseling will be an opportunity to explore feelings of betrayal, we will focus on living in the solution—and not only the problem—so that you can experience less trauma. By giving yourself the time and space to honestly address your needs and wants, create effective boundaries, and plan your next steps, you can make clear, healthy choices.
In addition to charting goals for your future, we will spend time helping you feel better right now. I can provide you with customized coping strategies that will allow you to calmly respond to your feelings and manage stress. Not only are these experiential counseling techniques effective for addressing your betrayal trauma specifically; they’ll help you become less triggered in stressful situations overall.
The tools and perspectives you gain in therapy will allow you to restore a sense of emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual safety. Experiencing this safety and trust in counseling can then lay the foundation for your life and relationship moving forward.
With the right kind of tailored, constructive support, you can move away from the shame and blame of betrayal trauma into a joyful, peaceful, and hopeful existence. Not only will you survive and recover from your partner’s infidelity—you will thrive in all areas of your life through therapy.
Perhaps You Have Concerns About Treatment For Betrayal Trauma…
I don’t feel comfortable working with a therapist—I’m embarrassed about my partner’s infidelity and ashamed of my behaviors in response to it.
You may feel the need to keep this information hidden from the rest of the world, but there are no judgments in therapy. As a therapist specializing in betrayal trauma and someone who did not receive the right kind of support when I was in crisis, I understand that it isn’t always safe to share your story with others.
Yet, the opposite of addiction is connection. Recovery from your partner’s infidelity and betrayal requires trust and the safe space of therapy to discuss the trauma. I can help you understand your response, process your anger, and find healing solutions so that you make confident, healthy choices moving forward.
Treatment for betrayal trauma is too time-consuming and expensive.
If you’re in crisis following a betrayal, your health, well-being, and sanity are probably in jeopardy. But you deserve to invest in yourself in order to heal. Counseling for betrayal trauma is time to take care of you and put yourself at the top of your priority list—not your partner’s addiction.
You are worthy of recovery, and I’m confident that you’ll look back on your experience in therapy as time and money well spent processing your partner’s infidelity.
My partner refuses any therapy or help for sex addiction.
You have the capacity to heal, regardless of what your partner is or isn’t doing to address their sex addiction. Therapy for betrayal trauma is an opportunity to take control of your life and develop accountability for your choices so that you can have healthy boundaries whether or not you stay with your partner.
Rediscover Connection Through Therapy So You Can Trust Again
Healing and recovery from betrayal trauma take time, but you can achieve goals and manage stress in counseling. To schedule an appointment or brief, 15-minute consultation, click here.
Recent Blog Posts
